Food Quotes and Other Randomness

I'm going through some electronic clutter at work. I came across this list of food quotes I compiled a while back. They make me smile. And what better reason to post for the first time in 6 months than to make it about food!!

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.

Charles M. Schulz

I love you like a fat kid loves cake!

                 Scott Adams

Popcorn for breakfast! Why not? It’s a grain. It’s like, like, grits, but with high self esteem

                 James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

Writers fish for the right words like fishermen fish for, um, whatever those aquatic creatures with fins and gills are called

                Jarod Kintz, This is the best book I’ve ever written, and it still sucks

The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook.

                Julia Child

Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.

                Mark Twain

What I say is that, if a man really likes potatoes, he must be a pretty decent sort of fellow.

                A.A. Milne

I am not a glutton – I am an explorer of food.

                Erma Bombeck

We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie.

                David Mamet, Boston Marriage

How can you govern a country which has 246 varieties of cheese?

                Charles de Gaulle

Ice cream is exquisite. What a pity it isn’t illegal.

                Voltair

I had a missed call. It’s probably the all you can eat buffet calling to say, “Come back! We know you can eat just a little bit more.”

                Jarod Kintz, At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you’d still waste time by reading it.

I am at the moment writing a lengthy indictment against our century. When my brain begins to reel from my literary labors, I make an occasional cheese dip.

                John Kennedy Toole, A Confederacy of Dunces

Blood may be thicker than water, but it’s certainly not as thick as ketchup. Nor does it go as well with French fries.

                Jarod Kintz

You can tell a lot about a lot about a fellow’s character by his way of eating jellybeans.

                Ronald Regan

Whoever thought a tiny candy bar should be called fun size was a moron.

                Glenn Beck

Tofu tacos are not Mexican. I think putting tofu on anything and calling it Mexican is an insult to my people.

                Simone Elkeles, Rules of Attraction

If you’re afraid of butter, use cream.

                Julia Child

The thought of two thousand people crunching celery at the same time horrified me.

                George Bernard Shaw

Tomatoes and oregano make it Italian; wine and tarragon make it French. Sour cream makes it Russian; lemon and cinnamon make it Greek. Soy sauce makes it Chinese; garlic makes it good.

                Alice May Brock

Always serve too much hot fudge on hot fudge sundaes. It makes people overjoyed, and puts them in your debt.

                Judith Olney

A good cook is like a sorceress who dispenses happiness.

                Elsa Schiaparelli

The cucumber and the tomato are both fruit; the avocado is a nut. To assist with the dietary requirements of vegetarians, on the first Tuesday of the month a chicken is officially a vegetable.

                Jasper Fforde, Shades of Grey

Waffles are like pancakes with syrup traps.

                Mitch Hedberg

“Have you tried the cinnamon things?” Poppet asks. “They’re rather new. What are they called Widge?”

“Fantastically delicious cinnamon things?”

                Erin Morgenstern, The Night Circus

Thanks cow. I appreciate your tastiness.

                Craig Ferguson

He was chugging brown pop from a can Jack handed him while he stuffed nacho cheese Doritos in his face. I was glad to see he looked lots better, almost completely like himself, which proves Doritos and brown pop really are health foods.

                P.C. Cast, Hunted

Pull up a chair. Take a taste. Come join us. Life is so endlessly delicious.

                Ruth Reichl

Bacon is the candy of meat.

                Kevin Taggart

What kind of person doesn’t let you have gummi bears?

                LIbba Bray, Beauty Queens

I suppose there are people who can pass up free guacamole, but they’re either allergic to avocado or too joyless to live.

                Frank Bruni, Born Round: The Secret History of a Full-time Eater

I like food that speaks to me. Food like French toast, English muffins, and Deviled eggs. Oh, oval embryonic spawn of chicken, why has thou deceived me?

                Jarod Kintz, $3.33

First we eat, then we do everything else.

                M.F.K. Fisher

I’m pretty sure that eating chocolate keeps wrinkles away because I have never seen a 10 year old with a Hershey bar and crows feet.

                Amy Neftzger

Fruit and vegetables and the sort of things that Uncle Vernon called “rabit food”

                J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire